How the heck did you land here? :)

Monday, December 12, 2005

Action Reaction!!

The Action...

"The smoking zone is the open space next to the coffee machine on every floor. People who don't smoke are forced to be passive smokers. Can we separate out the smoking zone? Can the open space of a particular floor be termed as smoking zone?"

A Reaction

"Terrace!! Build your stamina as you smoke!! "

The Ultimate Reaction!

"Smoking will be permitted only in the Small Balconies (Floor 1 to 6) on the river side of the Hall. Please do not bring your Tea/Coffee Mugs to these Balconies."

Outsourced Slaves

Throughout History India has been conquered, ruled, and exploited. The Mughals, the Shah's and then the British came, ruled us and left us as paupers. After independence, we begged and went with our begging bowl to an organization called the World Bank. We all think that things have improved after globalization, but then I think otherwise and I think we are still going back to slavery. But this time, its a little different.

The British first came under the guise of a company and said that they were here for trade. We know the histroy, they started ruling us and maybe, because of fear and of the might of their military, they ruled us and many other countries. Yep! the same thing is happening again but the difference is that now we are slaves of our own greed - money.

The Brits took raw materials from India as it was in abundance and that it was cheap. They forced us to get these raw materials. Of course we were paid which was peanuts. These raw materials were turned into a finished product and were sold in other parts of world and in India.

The scene is similar today, except that the mode is different and the words are polite - I would include "Company Processes" here. So what is it? Well, it's outsourcing! what we have here is us writing pieces of a big Story, without understanding the big picture. And then we have some smart "white" guy who outsources a job, puts all the pieces together, makes a product and sells it to the world.

We are given the work that they would rather give it to a servant, while they spend their time/resources in thinking about new ideas and products. Who implements these ideas? its us of course! a third world country who get a third of what they would have paid to some one of their own kind. For a piece of work which a High School pass out will do in US, an Indian has to be an Engineer. An american can work from 9 to 5, but you are expected to work as long as you can be stretched. What would have been the point of outsourcing, they may ask.

We are deep in the trap now. Yep! its the greed of money and we will continue to be slaves!!

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Rahul

Circa 1995: It’s a lazy afternoon of august and I was stretching myself in the balcony when I see him. Baseball cap, curly hair, glasses, sagging baggy pants, an oversized T-shirt, a cigarette in the left hand, and walking away without a care in the world. "Oh! so that’s the new guy", I think as I take another drag of tobacco. He disappeared in behind the walls of the Flats that we were living in. The construction in our New Campus was in full swing and as our hostel was still not complete so we *fach-chas* (as in college freshmen) were put up in flats that were supposed to be occupied by lecturers when the new campus was complete. I was supposed to go home for the weekend but I cancelled it. Too lazy to travel some 15 Kilometers just to eat Home Food.

I have never been very good in mathematics, so I decided to go on with practicing some problems (Engineering Mathematics-that was the subject! BLEH!!). The day went by and it was dark very soon.

I was reading a book when there was a knock in my room. A neighbor with whom I hardly talked to enters the room with the new fellow I had seen in the afternoon. "Hi Jimmy, this is Rahul." we shook hands and I offer them a seat.

"Jimmy, Rahul is going home tomorrow and he needs some money", my neighbor said.

“Just wondering if you could lend him some money" he continued

"No probs! How much?”

"Around 500 bucks"

"Just hold on"

I reach for my purse in the table and hand the money money to Rahul.

I didn’t hesitate one bit to give the money nor thought of how weird the situation was! Today my thoughts would have been like “Here is a neighbour I hardly talk to and he’s introducing me to some guy I have never met and someone who’s asking me to lend him money!!” or “something’s not really right here!!” blah blah blah…all the things that growing up does to you and me!! Time-how it changes you!!

"Thanks!!" Rahul said as I handed him the money.

I noticed Rahul was looking around the room, looking at Axl Rose's poster and a collage that I had made of models from a lifestyle magazine. He looked at my ashtray which I had made from an empty can of a deodorant. Rahul held it and talked for the first time…"Innovative!!" that was all he said!!

"Where are you from?" he asks me. "I'm from Mizoram and you?" "Cal"....as he looked around the room!

Yeah! That year I followed him to cal (Calcutta) with Robin and it turned out to be the best Christmas and New Year I have ever had. Well, we ended up being best buddies and he still gives a lot of load to these grey cells whenever Christmas approaches!!

Strange, but Christmas rocks in Cal!-that’s a personal exp actually :p

RIP Rahul…WISH you were here. (dot dot dot)

My Best Friend! Our Best Friend!!

Stop thinking about what you need - start thinking about you want! - Rahul

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Interaction with a new boss!!

My personal session with our new Biz Unit head:

Boss: Hi Jimmy, how are you?
*with a smile*
Me
: Great!! *the First Lie*
Boss: What did you do this morning?
Me: Brushed my teeth, took a shower, had my breakfast, came to office.
Boss: And what was the first thing you did in the office?
Me: I checked my mails, opened the documents I was working on yesterday...*This wasn't a Lie!!*
Boss: So tell me, how can I make things better for you?

Me: Well, I'm happy here. My mentor has been really been helpful. The teammates are co-operative...blah blah blah...Again! ALL LIES!!
Boss: Anything in particular you are annoyed about or any person in particular?
Me: No, I share a good rapport with everyone in the team. No person in particular. *Actually the previous person he interacted with had bitched a lot about my mentor...heh heh-office politics again!!*
Boss: How can I help you and make things better for you?
Now, I felt this question was genuine...
Me: Well, I'm currently ahead of schedule and the review comments have been good *I just had to add this word!*. I was wondering if it will be possible to grant me leave during the X-mas season...not more than 7 days...
Heh heh...saw him pick up his pen and make a note!!

Boss: Well, Jimmy it has been nice talking to you, I want to keep these interactions with the team on a fortnightly basis..blah blah blah...
I just left the room with a hand in my pocket and grinning about the lies I just spoke!!

Colleague: Kya Hua? (What happened?)
Me: Nothing much, and I narrated the interaction.
Colleague: Ya ya...the same silly things!

We had a hearty laugh and got back to work!!
Why do companies keep these silly interactions when nothing really comes out of it? Just let me do my work folks, that's what you hired me for!!

Thursday, August 18, 2005

What I received in my inbox this Friday...


One small request, no offence meant,
During the client interaction over the next week, please ensure that you have some mint after your smoke.

Just to avoid discomfort. :)

I'm sure you'll not mind but take this request positively.


Of course, I didn't mind. And well, I thanked the person for telling me beforehand.
What would you have done?